Friday, December 26, 2008

The Living Dead Among Us..

by Louise Uccio Disgusted With the System

The Living Dead.. yeah.. that about covers it.. We know who we are.. We are parents without our children by no fault of our own.. (Or We are children without parents,)

Most days we get by... or at least it appears that way you the rest of the world... Some of us function on what appears to be a normal level.. some of us are just to traumatized to function on a normal level.. Having your (family) child torn out of your life is like having your soul die..

Today is Christmas... and many Mothers and or Fathers .. wish only for the chance to be with their children again..(Many of us yearn for our families that were destroyed when corruption and money meant more)

While the rest of the world is busy shopping.. enjoying family.. or planning for the holidays.. those of us.. The Living Dead... who will not see our children for the holidays.. perhaps for what will be "yet another" year... have been busy planning... how to stay alive.. how to not go off the deep end.. and end up in an institution.. in jail.. or in a coffin... sorry but gift giving isn't our top priority.. at this time of year... Most of us suffer severe Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) .. and going into the malls.. or shopping.. is in itself traumatizing... Believe it or not just being in the presence of other families .. and or children is to painful to bare...

Sometimes some of us attempt to go to families houses and smile... Trust me that is one of the hardest things I've been called upon to do in the last seven years.. To be expected to smile when all you want to do is cry! But most don't understand the horrific pain in our hearts... most wouldn't understand why we declined invite after invite to join the rest of the family to celebrate... Celebrate what?

Our souls have been ripped to shreds.. or worlds torn apart... our minds can only focus on how to undo what was usually corruption that tore our children/families away from us in the first place.. and now you want me/us to sit there and smile while the rest of the family usually all intact..

children and all.. celebrates being "together" Forgive me.. but that's just not doable.. you may have been able to get us to "show up" if the PTSD is under control .. and we feel we wont have flash backs.. or go into a deep depression if we come.... but even if we are there.. it's only in body.. not in mind or soul.. that has been forever stolen from us.. we can't focus on anything but being whole again.. with our families.. or lives.. our children back where they belong... knowing they have been living a lie.. while we fought desperately to get them back...

For the Alienated families .. after a divorce.. I've heard stories of siblings.. coming back one at a time .. usually after a bitter divorce where one parent alienates the children.. with the courts blessings (usually due to political connections.. or money).... whatever the reason.. one parent is tossed like a bag of garbage by the more disturbed parent that felt "entitled" as most Narcissists/Psychopaths do... to keep the children away... Later in life.. as the children grow.. they sometimes learn ... or figure out that the parent they thought left them.. never left.. but was forced out ... and that adult child seeks the tossed out parent... It has to be hard for those parents.. once the adult children returned.. while the younger children were still held captive... and had not figured it all out yet.. to separate their emotions.. for they would be called upon.. to be elated that the older child/children reconnected and they now have a chance to be together... At the same time.. the parent is longing for the entire family to be together.. and they are torn between enjoying the older child/children while dying inside that they can not have the younger children there as well... It also has to be hard for the older child/children to know the pain of the parent and not be able to help.. but just to be there for that parent.. until the family is all back together again...

I have one son (29 years old now) that was never alienated - so I used him as a reference here.. when I share the pain in spite of having one or more of your children return...For the families torn apart by CPS where no children are left in the home... Has to be equivalent to what being an alienated parent feels.. but I don't know.. although my estranged husband used child protective services... and lies to get full custody and keep me away.. I wouldn't know what it truly feels like to have your children in foster care .. so if anyone would like to comment and let the readers know.. go right ahead..

In closing.. I want to say ... Happiest possible holidays to those of us among the Living Dead... My wish for us all .. is that our children figure it out and give us the best holiday gift possible ... by returning to us by next year! For those that happen across this blog and are not separated from your children... I ask that you try to understand how difficult it is living among.. THE LIVING DEAD! Sadly .. many Alienators will read this .. and not "get it" because they are to dysfunctional.. to get anything.. let alone ... the destruction they have caused not only the target parent .. but those children they kidnapped as well...

Happy Holidays to all.. and to all a good nite!

A Candlelight Vigil for our Families Destroyed by a greedy and disfunctional system

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