Sunday, December 23, 2007

Letters to Editor - Blame The Criminals- Not The Victims!

D.T. Writes Elder Abuse


I am surprised that four years after my father's death, I still feel so much frustration and anger over my dad being scammed at the end of his life. I feel like the kid who's telling the Catholic Church that he/she was molested by a priest.

I'm still getting most of my inheritance (that's been an unbelievable ordeal by itself - since lousy people got involved with the distrubtion of his estate, too) but only because I spent countless thousands of dollars, pints of blood, sweat, and tears dealing with professionals, elder abuse personnel, lawyers, police, staying at hotels, renting condos, etc. all to keep up with the hoards of people surrounding my sick father who had lots of money, a big heart and no personal boundaries with strangers.

What I DID NOT GET was to see my father at the end of his life - an old girlfriend was given control of his body and person by other crooks wanting to get my dad's large estate and business. The new book "T is for Trespass" by Sue Grafton is a "cute chronicle" compared to the sick, evil, twisted behavior that went on behind closed doors as I (the only sane and loving person in my dad's life) fought to bond with my dad and keep greedy people from trying to steal everything he had before he passed on.

Everyone convinced my dad I was bad news which is so ridiculous I can't even begin to comprehend the uncanny evil that must possess people to be this greedy in this lifetime (my own relatives, too.) I want to believe in people again, but I just don't - mostly because there are still so many people who won't validate my experience (friends, relatives, and all of those people who fear the very nature of this crime - don't blame them.) I won't fly on a plane, don't feel happy having money, and love my dogs more than any human.

I used to be fun-loving, proud of my dad and his great car dealership in Palm Springs. He started with nothing and became a great businessman and had complete passion for his work. Everyone still wants to "blame the victim" (he had bad taste in girlfriends, etc.) I feel like I made up my entire past. If no one ever sees this, thanks for giving me an opportunity to "vent" at this time of year. I'm the only female in a large family of men - and no one, and I mean NO ONE gets what I went through as my dad's daughter. And no - it was none of my dad's three kids who did any of the scamming. It was all done by non-blood strangers. America sure isn't the country is used to be. Everyone is greedy and into gaining materially these days - ironically my dad WASN'T. He just made a lot of money because he loved what he did. "I'm often embarassed I'm an American."

I still love my God and am thankful for that relationship and my husband and sons - who my dad loved, too.

Merry Christmas


Dear D.T;

Thanks for writing to E.A. we are taking the liberty to publish your courageous letter because the success your father attained is very commendable and so is his contribution to his government and our society as whole. Your father success attracted the predators and highlights the fact that our government in its indifference and its in-ability to adequately protect our elders once old age and senility sets in leaves much to be desired.

D.T. Please correct me if I am wrong but without knowing the entire story I can just about know that the "girlfriend" was NOT included in your father's original will . The predators know that the 'elder financial abuser' usually has nothing to lose and everything to gain, so the predator does not mind spreading it around ! and sharing the booty with others who swarm in to protect the elder financial abuser(s) by dis-crediting the original heirs. (The story repeats itself, over and over)

In speaking out for the voiceless , we realize that telling your father story isn't an easy thing to do , and believe me it doesn't get any easier but your story is fascinating and needs to be told! And who better than you to tell it ?

We will continue to give a voice to victims like you everywhere, unafraid, and hold our heads up high, continuing to publish the letters like yours from people that have the courage to speak out and encourage others to come forward with their stories.

Merry Christmas D.T. from all of us.................

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dear DT
I'm having a similar situation with my 77 year-old aunt and a group of parishioners from her Catholic parish that she was way too generous to. I'd like to tell my story the way you told yours. I consider myself lucky in one sence: I am getting validation from other people. THese are the people who did not praise her "generosity". These are the real friends and family who value her no matter.